How Do I Say No?

August 28, 2016

How do I say No? That is a good question. I’ve been told I am too nice in certain circumstances. I should not allow myself to feel sorry for people so I have to find a way to say “no” instead of yes. Besides, they do not feel in the least bit sorry for me.

I can play the “what if” game. This is a game played by people who work in corrections. I work in corrections and allowing the slightest infraction can cost me more than anything. I know one thing. “No” is about to be my new best friend. After a while, I doubt I will have to worry about anyone asking for anything anyway because they will know my answer. No.

How to say “No” by Anita Vaughn


Inmate “Can I…”

Me “No.”

I’m in a bad habit of not saying “no.” That habit is about to get broke and broke quick. I guess I was afraid people would not like or respect me. I’ve been this way for years. There has always been a line. I would never do anything illegal or immoral. Now the line is much closer. Nothing or no one is worth what is precious to me and what I worked so hard for.

I’ve been doing some research and I discovered that I am an empathetic person. God help me. I think it is ok to be empathetic but I know I can carry it too far. Needless to say, I am praying for God to give me His wisdom and boldness to do what is right.

My empathy is shrinking. Rapidly.






My Heart Warmed at Work

August 25, 2016

I had something interesting happen the other day. My new supervisor (who beat me out for a promotion recently) did something that warmed my heart.

Let me back up a little to begin with. Recently, I went up for a promotion at work.  One other person went up for the promotion. We both decided that the one who didn’t get the promotion would be supportive of the one who got the promotion. Long story short, he got it and I was proud of him.

Bless his heart, I’m old enough to be his momma. This kind young man showed me respect in the work place that no one has ever shown me. He wanted to talk to me the other day. He explained to me why he does some things the way he does. He did not have to do this. I was glad that he did though. My heart was warmed. He is trying so hard and doing such a fantastic job. I couldn’t be prouder of him if he was my own son. I decided that my employer has a diamond in the rough. They better watch out because this kind young man that I am blessed to have as my supervisor, is going places.



Am I Valuable???

August 15, 2016

I often wonder if I will ever succeed at something. In the last day or so, it hit me that in the next two years, I will turn 50 years of age and I am still working in an entry-level position. I don’t have a career. I have a job.  I do not feel valuable.

Although, I am in college (online) and I am working towards a career I am continually stuck in the beginning phases. I have always wanted a degree and a career so I could earn enough to retire and travel the world. I also want to help people. I always try to lift others up but there are times where I feel put down. If there is ever a time that I can move up in a career, I don’t want to make anyone who works for me feel as though they are beneath me.

It is hard not to feel like a failure at my age. People my age are CEO s and are in their prime. They are Doctors and Professors. They are Sheriffs and Fire Chiefs. They work the hours they want to because there are those like me in entry-level positions working the hours they do not have to. These people are making a difference. I know that I make a difference in a small way but I do not feel valuable. I know that I can not go back and start over and hindsight is surely 20/20. I can, however warn my younger readers.

Get your education while you are young and before you have children. You will be freed up to study and learn. If you have small children, find a way to get your education. There is nothing wrong with being a stay at home parent if your spouse is working but both of you get your education.

The struggle is real. This is no joke. I am feeling inadequate in my job/career life right now and I want something good to come out of it. I pray someone who is young and pondering their life and career will take my words into consideration.

Everyone has a purpose. No one should weigh self-worth or value by their job or career but many of us do.

In order to change my feelings of inadequacy, I will continue in school, do my best to learn and get the highest grade I can. I will do my best at work and I will try to keep a good attitude by helping as many people as I can. I will try to make work easier for my co-workers and supervisors so I can at least be of some value all though I do not feel that I am.

We will see what happens…

Dreams Continue…

August 14, 2016


If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go? I asked my youngest daughter this question not too long ago. She told me she would go to Australia. I would love to take her. Hopefully, I will some day.

I have always wanted to travel to far away places…go on adventures during my lifetime. I would love to live for a period of time in these different places. I’ve always wanted to leave a mark on each corner of the earth. I love the different cultures. I love the scenic views in the different parts of the world. The mountains are Gods gift to me. There beauty fills my heart with boundless joy.

I would love to visit the villages in Italy where people hang baskets of flowers under their windows. I love how flowers tower up the outer walls of the houses and above the quaint little towns. People appreciate the beauty that God has bestowed upon their part of this world.

I would love to visit the fjords in Norway. I would love to take a boat around the lakes and view the mountains up close. I would climb every mountain if I could. I often find myself collecting photos of different mountain regions in the world. They are so beautiful.

I would love to visit the Big Apple. I’d love to see Time Square at night. I’d stay out all night long. I would most likely people watch.

Alaska is known as the last frontier. I would probably live there if it were feasible. Alaska is wild like my soul. I often wondered what it would be like to visit the Bering Sea on a crab boat for a trip out and just smell the fragrance that only the sea can offer.

I would love to hit every national and state park in America. Maybe I can when I retire. I want to get a travel trailer and hit the road for a couple of years. I’d love to meet new friends along the way. I would love to canoe various lakes and enjoy this beautiful country that God made. I love to camp. I love the outdoors. There is something refreshing about sleeping outside. I would love for one night…Okay, two or three nights at least…to sleep under the stars and appreciate first hand what God has created. The beauty is something to behold.

I love the sound that the leaves in the trees make when the wind blows just right. It doesn’t have to blow too hard. I love listening to birds as they roost for the night. I love the color of the sky when the sun sets. You know the purple, pink and yellowish color. I love sitting back in a comfy chair covered up in a cozy blanket around a camp fire. I love staying up all night and watching the fire burn out. I love spending this time with friends who I care so much about.

Last but not least, I have always wanted to go on a mission trip. I plan on making that dream come true before I make any other dream come true. I will only do these things by the grace of God. What are your dreams?